I have arrived at a place of overflowing blessing. God's faithfulness is new every morning. Every time I get impatient and try to plan my future, God stops me and reminds me he is with me every step of the journey.
I am a planner. At university I began a habit of planning out my week. When I had classes, and blocks of time when I got my homework done or studied for a midterm or exam. I was extremely disciplined. When I started Trim Healthy Mama, I was also extremely rigid and controlled. It is in my nature to want to control everything!
But when you progress to trying to control other people, that is when you cross the line into manipulation. And the thing is.... I am good at it. I know just how to pick a fight. What I can say that will start a war of words. I actually enjoy debate, argumentation, and controversy. And I confess, I am a little bit of drama queen.
So the flip side of that is I can be very empathetic and compassionate. I have had that sense of compassion from childhood, but it went away for awhile in my late teens and early twenties. That was my angry at God period.
God has been changing me in the last two or three years, and the work has been so gradual, it is almost imperceptible, but it has been happening, This spring and summer have been a trial by fire, a purifying rain, but I feel like thanks to Jesus, I have passed the test, as Galdarial would have said. Jesus has such a firm grip on me, I know I will not fall and his promises will not fail. Great is his Faithfulness!