Thursday, September 09, 2010

Peanut Butter Filcher and Boredom-Induced Chocoholic

It only takes a short time to fall back into a bad habit. I am back to eating when I am bored and when there is no one around. I eat peanut butter with a spoon. I filch chocolate chips and eat hunks of cheese with crackers. I am not actually hungry, but I crave chocolate.

My chocolate obsession began early. I was known to do anything for a piece of chocolate cake. I have a mini chocolate gift book from one sister and a chocolate recipe book from another with glossy photos of decadent creations. My sister thought I could just stare at the photos and get inner satisfaction, but it is my dream to make the most extravagantly exquisite cheesecake in the whole book, the one that requires a whole bag of caramels and many garnishes to make it as perfect as it is in the photo.

I stopped eating chocolate once. After awhile I didn't even want it anymore. Everything was just too sweet because I was off very sugary things. That season of Lent I lost twenty pounds of excess weight. Oh to be svelte and slender again!

Actually I don't want to be quite as slender as then. But less rotund would be nice... The thing is the more you obsess about it the less likely you are to succeed. Maybe I should just exercise more and stop snacking when I am not actually hungry. Yeah... if I had the willpower to do that, I would still fit into those jeans I am hanging onto just in case.

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